Don't shoot the messenger...

Three fishermen were fishing when they came upon a mermaid. The mermaid offered them one wish each. The first fisherman said, “Double my I.Q.”
So, the mermaid did it and to his surprise, he started reciting Shakespeare. Then the second fisherman said, “Triple my I.Q.”
And sure enough, the mermaid did it and amazingly he started doing math problems he didn’t know existed.
The third fisherman was so impressed he asked the mermaid to quadruple his I.Q. and the mermaid said, “Are you sure about this? It will change your whole life!”
The fisherman said “Yes”
So, the mermaid turned him into a woman.....

One day, two guys Frank, and Bob, were out fishing. A funeral service passes over the bridge they’re fishing by, and Bob takes off his hat and puts it over his heart. He does this until the funeral service passes by.
Frank said, “Gee, Bob, I didn’t know you had it in you!”
Bob replied, “It’s the least I could do. After all, I was married to her for 30 years.”...

Game warden: “Didn’t you see the no-fishing sign, son?”
Boy: “I’m not fishing, sir. I’m teaching these worms how to swim!”....

Three priests were fishing on a boat when they ran out of bait. The first priest got up and walked across the water to get some more bait. After two hours they ran out of bait again and the second priest said he would go get more bait, so he got up and walked across the water. After three hours of fishing, they ran out of bait again and the third priest said he would get more bait. So, he stepped out of the boat and went straight to the bottom.
The first priest turned to the second priest and asked, “Should we have told him where the rocks were?”....

Little Eddy and his mum were digging for fishing bait in the garden. Uncovering a many-legged creature, Eddy proudly dangled it before his mum.

“No, honey, it won’t do for bait,” she said. “It’s not an earthworm.”

“It’s not?” Eddy asked, his eyes wide. “What planet is it from?”....

Jim got up bright and early one weekend and headed to the local river. He fished all day long but didn’t catch a thing. On the way home, he stopped at the fish market.

“I want to buy the three biggest trout you’ve got,” he said to the owner.

The owner starts to bag up his order when Jim says, “No need for that, just throw them at me.”

“Why would I do that?” the owner asked.

“So I can tell my wife that I caught three fish today!”...

A woman is walking on a beach in Texas carrying two Redfish in a bucket. A game warden walks up and asks to see her fishing license.

“I don’t have a fishing license,” says the woman.

“You know it’s illegal to fish without a license, right?” asks the warden.

“I wasn’t fishing, officer. These Redfish are my pets.”

“Your pets?”

“Yes, officer. They like a little exercise, so when the weather’s fine, I take them to the water and let them swim around. Once they’re done, I give them a whistle and they jump back into my bucket and we head home.”

The officer isn’t buying a word of it, so the woman says, “Don’t believe me? Watch!” and she throws the fish into the sea.

The warden waits for a minute then says, “Alright, now whistle to your fish and make them jump out of the water.”

The fisherwoman turns to the officer and says, “What fish?”...

Bob’s walking down the street when he sees a kid sitting on his front porch jigging in a bucket.

As he reaches the kid, Bob stops for a better look. The bucket’s empty.

He asks the kid, “What are you fishing for, son?”

The kid looks up and says with a shrug, “Suckers mainly.”

Bob smiles and asks, “Caught any yet?”

“Yep,” the kid replies. “You’re the tenth.”

Three fishermen were fishing when they came upon a mermaid. The mermaid offered them one wish each. The first fisherman said, “Double my I.Q.”
So, the mermaid did it and to his surprise, he started reciting Shakespeare. Then the second fisherman said, “Triple my I.Q.”
And sure enough, the mermaid did it and amazingly he started doing math problems he didn’t know existed.
The third fisherman was so impressed he asked the mermaid to quadruple his I.Q. and the mermaid said, “Are you sure about this? It will change your whole life!”
The fisherman said “Yes”
So, the mermaid turned him into a woman...